by Dianna Dorisi

“Hey, Dad, check this out,” I said, trying to flatten myself against the display window of Franklin’s Video, and desperately hoping the Jenson girls across the street would pass by without spotting me.

If they recognized me and saw my dad, all 320 pounds of him, I’d be the laughing stock of my 4-H Club for the whole summer.

“Check what out, Erin?” Dad asked.

“Oh, never mind,” I said, forcing a giggle. “I thought I saw that movie we’ve been watching for, but it was another title.”

I cast a cautious glance over my shoulder as Jody and Cara Jenson walked by without turning. I felt the familiar mix of relief and shame that I always felt after preventing someone from seeing Dad. It wasn’t that I didn’t love him. He was a great dad. But spending time with him in public made me a nervous wreck.

We’d lived in Bakersfield for only five months, and so far I’d done a pretty good job of keeping people from seeing us together. Open house at school had been a big challenge. That was the night I’d come down with a sudden headache and sore throat. The parent-student luncheon had gone well because Dad had to work, so just Mom and I went. But now that it was summer, I faced my biggest obstacle ever. In just two weeks my 4-H Club was having a father-daughter campout. And not only did my dad know about it, he couldn’t wait to go! Worrying about it was making me miserable.

Before I knew it, the campout was only a week away and I still had absolutely no idea what to do. Dad was out in the front yard checking our tent for holes and I was handing him tent pegs, smiling on the outside and dying on the inside.

“I sure hope you don’t feel obligated to go camping with me,” I said. “It’s no problem if you’d rather do something else.”

Dad hammered in the final peg and then slowly stood, breathing heavily from the exertion. “Are you kidding? I’ve been looking forward to this all month. We’re gonna have a great time.”

“Unless it decides to rain,” I said, making an effort to keep the eagerness from my voice. “That would be a real bummer.”

Dad gave me a playful frown. “Rain? It wouldn’t dare.”

No, I thought. With my luck it probably wouldn’t.

The next evening I sat in a stupor as Cara and Jody’s dad, who also happened to be our 4-H leader, discussed final plans for the campout. Mr. Jenson was really nice-looking, slender and fit. Why couldn’t my dad look like that? I figured nobody snickered and made jokes about Mr. Jenson behind his back.

When Mr. Jenson asked whose fathers would be coming on the campout, all except for me and a girl named Ruby raised their hands. “I’m not sure yet,” I told Mr. Jenson hesitantly. “My dad might be out of town.”

As soon as the meeting ended, I quickly scooted over beside Ruby. She was 12, like me, but shy and quiet, and I’d spoken with her only once or twice. “So why isn’t your dad coming?” I asked, bluntly.

Ruby looked away, embarrassed, and shrugged her slight shoulders. “He can’ t.”

“Busy with work?”

I guess it was the way Ruby lowered her eyes and looked away that convinced me she was lying. I decided to take a chance.

“You don’t want him to come?”

“That’s not true,” she said.

“Well, maybe not. But it’s okay if it is. I mean, I understand. I’m having the same kind of problem.”

Ruby gave me a suspicious look. “You don’t want your dad to come?”

I glanced over my shoulder and lowered my voice to a whisper. “No. Mr. Jenson is the only one from the club that knows him, and I’m afraid everybody would laugh at him because he’s overweight.”

“How overweight?”

“Very.”

Ruby nodded like she understood, and I felt an instant bonding with her.

“Well,” she said. “He might be fat, but at least you have a dad.”

A strange sensation prickled my neck. “What do you mean?” I asked.

Ruby gave me a sad look. “My dad died four years ago. That’s why he’s not going on the campout.”

I suddenly felt like a real idiot. Here I’d been blabbing on like I had her situation all figured out, when actually I didn’t know anything at all. “Oh, man, Ruby. I’m – I’m really sorry. I didn’t know.”

She nodded and looked away. “It’s okay.”

That night in bed, our conversation kept playing over and over in my mind like my favorite CD. I felt really bad for Ruby. But at the same time, it didn’t really change my worries about taking Dad on the campout. What was I going to do? Try to convince Dad that the trip had been canceled for some reason and then try to live with a guilty conscience for the rest of my life? Force myself to be honest, and risk hurting his feelings terribly? Or just bite my tongue and let him come and make me the laughingstock of the kids?

I realized that the second option was probably the one I should go with. After all, honesty was supposed to be the best policy, wasn’t it? So the next evening, I tried to be honest. I really did. My parents and I were on our way home from a restaurant, and I sat in the back seat of the car trying to come up with the right words.

“Hey, Dad…” I began, hating myself for what I was about to say.

“Yeah, I see them,” he said, braking and pulling over to a stop on the side of the road.

I blinked, thoroughly confused. “See who?”

“Bob Jenson. Behind us. Looks like he’s having truck trouble.”

I craned my neck to look behind me as Dad slowly worked himself out from behind the steering wheel. My heart froze in my chest. Mr. Jenson was about 30 feet behind us, bending over the engine of his pickup while Cara and Jody leaned up against the cab looking bored. I thought about shrinking down in the seat, but knew they’d already seen me. So I forced myself out of the car and sauntered toward them, trying to appear as casual and nonchalant as possible. Cara and Jody were watching my dad, sizing him up, and any second I expected the giggles and whispers. But none came. In fact, as I drew close, I was surprised to find them looking as embarrassed as I felt.

“It’s sure great to see you guys,” Jody said. “I can’t believe my dad let us get stuck out here like this.”

Cara rolled her eyes and nodded. “For an hour. Can you believe it? Dad doesn’t know how to fix anything.”

I couldn’t believe it all right. Couldn’t believe they could they find fault with such a perfect-looking dad as Mr. Jenson. Then as Cara’s words sunk in, a sudden rush of pride surged through me. “Oh, yeah?” I said, lightly. “My dad’s great at fixing stuff.”

“Make him come on the campout,” Cara said. “Maybe he can show Dad how to set up a tent.”

All three of us laughed, and I felt like a tremendous weight had been lifted from my shoulders. It suddenly dawned on me that maybe I was far more concerned with my dad’s size than anyone else was.

I glanced at Jody and Kara. I guess it was seeing the two of them standing there together that made a light bulb go on in my head. If Mr. Jenson could take two kids on the campout, why couldn’t we? Maybe Dad and I could “adopt” Ruby for the weekend and she could go with us? I knew Dad would think it was a great idea. Something told me Ruby might too. I couldn’t wait to get home and call her